For a strong woman living an independent life in the 21st century, feminism is usually a big deal. Men who get off on being dominated by women dressed in leather and holding a whip are seen as men who’ve found an excellent way to release some of the stress built up inside their body. But what about the women who like to submit to their partners for sexual pleasure? Are they seen as weak and dependant? To most people, being a feminist means standing up for yourself and not letting a man tell you what to do. But could sexual submission and feminism actually go hand in hand? According to the ladies who like being on the receiving end of a little D/s play, submission is all about being pleased without having to be in control. Submissive women dating comes down to using her surrender to turn her on and blowing her mind while finding pleasure in her pleasure, and below we discuss this in more detail.
They’re No Push-Overs
Women who enjoy submitting themselves to their partners’ command agree that being a sub in the bedroom doesn’t mean being a push-over in life. Being a sub is about being overly compliant, but in no way does it mean being lazy or unwilling to take a more active role during sex.
Most of the women who take on the submissive role in the bedroom are very controlling in life. They hold positions of power and deal with lots of pressure at work. Some of them are even perceived as intimidating by their peers. Nobody looks after them, and when they come home and want to unwind they want something different. They want to be taken care of.
In the privacy of their homes and bedrooms, they don’t want to be the ones to make all the decisions and they certainly don’t want any of the responsibility anymore. They need a break from taking care of everyone and just want to surrender to their partners, knowing that they’ll be given what they want if they do what they’re told.
It’s Not Just Whips and Chains
Not every Sub enjoys direct control. Being tied up with a blindfold on is just one of the options as there are plenty of ladies out there who like to be restrained with words or just a glance. Some of them don’t like to comply right away and enjoy a little power struggle with their partners. They won’t do something the first time they’re told as they want to push their partners to the limit and make them be truly persuasive Doms.
For a D/s relationship to really work, there has to be a high level of trust and communication between the people involved. Women who like to be submissive say they are turned on by their men patronizing them in the bedroom, but they would never tolerate being pushed over in the same way by their partners in any other setting. Also, these women would never be happy if their partners dominated them, told them what to do, and then not satisfy their sexual needs because no good D/s relationship is ever one-sided.
It Strengthens the Bond
Couples who practice these kinds of D/s activities in the bedroom couldn’t really be equal partners outside of it, right? Well, wrong. So many of these couples balance this against how they feel about each other the rest of the time and in no way is anyone ever treated like a doormat. Women who are submissive in the bedroom don’t suffer from lack of self-confidence in real life, and just because they like a little BDSM doesn’t mean they do it every time they have sex. They make special dates for a little D/s, and enjoy being ‘used and abused’ on occasion as a way to release everyday stress. Women who submit to their partners sexually are usually very strong and very trusting, and they know that if their partners really enjoy dominating them, this submission would only deepen their connection and their relationship.
To them, being a sub is empowering and they don’t feel lesser because of it. They feel very sexy and turned on, plus if it’s a secret and nobody knows they’re into it, it makes them feel naughty in a very good way. What’s more, these women are often feminists, and the D/s play in no way diminishes that because the most important thing is to use the sub’s submission to turn her on and please her. It’s also important that each partner can openly communicate their desires without fear of judgment or rejection. Rejection is usually something that rarely happens because these couples trust each other to a point that pretty much everything is on the table, provided they talk about it first.
Finally, some women think that submission doesn’t do it for them because they’re inferior. Instead, it’s such a great turn-on because they’re thrill seekers. They love just letting go, not being in control or having to make any decisions, and just being able to enjoy the sensations and experiences. They compare their D/s play to a roller coaster ride and say if they were in charge of the ride they wouldn’t be able to enjoy it as much as the passengers.